1 00:00:08,018 --> 00:00:11,418 This programme contains some strong language from the start, 2 00:00:11,418 --> 00:00:14,338 scenes which some viewers may find upsetting 3 00:00:14,338 --> 00:00:16,698 and discriminatory language. 4 00:00:16,698 --> 00:00:18,498 He snores. 5 00:00:29,419 --> 00:00:33,539 Phone buzzes 6 00:00:37,499 --> 00:00:38,859 fuck. 7 00:00:40,859 --> 00:00:41,979 Shit! 8 00:00:45,139 --> 00:00:47,939 Hello? Hi, Adam. 9 00:00:47,939 --> 00:00:50,699 It's shruti, one of the shos. Sorry to disturb you. 10 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,500 Erm, you're on the rota for labour ward today, 11 00:00:53,500 --> 00:00:56,100 and mr Lockhart... Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 12 00:00:56,100 --> 00:00:58,820 Erm, tell him I'm really sorry. 13 00:00:58,820 --> 00:01:01,540 I think there's been an accident. I've been sat here for an hour... 14 00:01:02,580 --> 00:01:03,820 He groans 15 00:01:05,380 --> 00:01:06,940 and I'll be there in a minute. 16 00:01:08,660 --> 00:01:10,620 Well, I'm not dead, am I? 17 00:01:10,620 --> 00:01:13,140 Please tell me you haven't ordered a coffin. 18 00:01:13,140 --> 00:01:16,300 Of course I'm not having an affair. I wouldn't have the time. 19 00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:19,820 I just fell asleep last night when I went to the car. 20 00:01:19,821 --> 00:01:22,661 Who did you phone? Please tell me you haven't phoned the police. 21 00:01:22,661 --> 00:01:24,461 Well, who did you phone, then? 22 00:01:24,461 --> 00:01:26,021 Oh, sorry. 23 00:01:26,021 --> 00:01:27,261 Who did you phone, then? 24 00:01:28,461 --> 00:01:30,101 My mum?! 25 00:01:31,541 --> 00:01:33,981 Shit. Are you deranged? 26 00:01:33,981 --> 00:01:35,981 And what did she...? 27 00:01:35,981 --> 00:01:38,181 She cries out 28 00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:40,861 don't go anywhere. I'm going to call you right back. 29 00:01:40,861 --> 00:01:43,021 Is coming out! 30 00:01:43,021 --> 00:01:44,541 Is coming out! 31 00:01:44,541 --> 00:01:46,981 Well, a stroke of luck, you've come to the right place. 32 00:01:46,981 --> 00:01:48,661 Let's get you up to labour ward, shall we? 33 00:01:48,662 --> 00:01:50,462 It's, erm, a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. 34 00:01:50,462 --> 00:01:51,862 She cries out 35 00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:54,142 do you mind if I have a quick check? 36 00:01:54,142 --> 00:01:55,942 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said. 37 00:01:55,942 --> 00:01:57,382 I'm Adam. And you are...? 38 00:01:57,382 --> 00:01:59,222 Andrea. Andrea. 39 00:01:59,222 --> 00:02:00,862 She gasps 40 00:02:02,262 --> 00:02:07,822 ok. Ok, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm 41 00:02:07,822 --> 00:02:10,342 has come out. That is normal? 42 00:02:11,462 --> 00:02:14,302 Take a wild guess. Baby is lying sideways. 43 00:02:14,302 --> 00:02:16,902 Do you understand that? Sideways? 44 00:02:16,902 --> 00:02:19,582 So you need a caesarean section. Oh, caesarean. 45 00:02:19,583 --> 00:02:22,183 I've got a scalpel in my back pocket. You'll be fine. 46 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:23,543 Shall we go? 47 00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:25,783 Yeah. Yeah? That's it. 48 00:02:27,463 --> 00:02:29,543 That's it. You ok? 49 00:02:29,543 --> 00:02:32,983 Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut. Let's go this way. 50 00:02:32,983 --> 00:02:34,703 I don't want to hurry you, Andrea, 51 00:02:34,703 --> 00:02:37,183 but we've got to get going. You're doing brilliantly. 52 00:02:37,183 --> 00:02:39,423 - It's ok. Deep breaths. - Mind yourselves! 53 00:02:39,423 --> 00:02:41,503 Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up. 54 00:02:41,503 --> 00:02:44,183 She cries out that's it, we're nearly there. 55 00:02:44,183 --> 00:02:46,143 We're going to go up in the staff lift. 56 00:02:46,143 --> 00:02:47,383 Nearly there, nearly there. 57 00:02:48,704 --> 00:02:52,224 Come on. This is lift? It's safe. Come on. 58 00:02:52,224 --> 00:02:55,104 Really? Yeah. You can do it. I can't! 59 00:02:55,104 --> 00:02:56,704 No, wait. Wait, wait. 60 00:02:56,704 --> 00:02:59,224 Wait for it. No, no, no. Ok, are you ready? 61 00:02:59,224 --> 00:03:00,624 Three, two, one. 62 00:03:00,625 --> 00:03:02,015 She cries out 63 00:03:02,024 --> 00:03:04,544 keep breathing. Nice deep breaths. 64 00:03:04,544 --> 00:03:06,784 When I say so, we're going to jump out of the lift. 65 00:03:06,784 --> 00:03:08,184 Are you a real doctor? 66 00:03:08,184 --> 00:03:09,824 Fair question... 67 00:03:09,824 --> 00:03:11,984 Though, strangely, one you've asked me 68 00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:13,704 after you showed me your vagina. 69 00:03:13,704 --> 00:03:16,544 Right, there you go. Yes? 70 00:03:16,545 --> 00:03:18,695 Ok, so, let's get ready. 71 00:03:18,705 --> 00:03:20,735 Get ready. 72 00:03:20,745 --> 00:03:23,415 And jump! Don't worry, don't worry. 73 00:03:23,425 --> 00:03:26,145 The lift will go round and we'll have another go. 74 00:03:27,385 --> 00:03:29,975 You're doing really well. What's happening? 75 00:03:29,985 --> 00:03:31,615 It's just going through the... 76 00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,415 Through the roof bit before it goes down. 77 00:03:33,425 --> 00:03:34,455 Clanging 78 00:03:34,465 --> 00:03:36,375 all right? It'll be light again soon. 79 00:03:36,385 --> 00:03:38,545 Something's wrong! Look! Ok. 80 00:03:39,985 --> 00:03:42,215 Jesus Christ. We call this a cord prolapse. 81 00:03:42,225 --> 00:03:44,905 Ideally, it would happen on labour ward, not in a mad lift. 82 00:03:44,906 --> 00:03:47,506 Ok, Andrea, everything's going to be fine. 83 00:03:47,506 --> 00:03:49,026 I mean, it might be fine. 84 00:03:49,026 --> 00:03:51,546 If the cord gets cold, then baby stops getting blood. 85 00:03:51,546 --> 00:03:53,506 No more blood, no more baby. 86 00:03:53,506 --> 00:03:56,386 Right, hold it inside. You understand? Inside. 87 00:03:56,386 --> 00:03:58,066 Yeah. Come on, come on, come on. 88 00:03:58,066 --> 00:04:00,426 Are you the sho? Staff lifts now. 89 00:04:00,426 --> 00:04:02,306 Bring a hospital bed and a box of gloves. 90 00:04:02,306 --> 00:04:04,546 Literally now. Cord prolapse. 91 00:04:04,546 --> 00:04:05,706 She cries out 92 00:04:05,707 --> 00:04:06,867 right, come on, Andrea, 93 00:04:06,866 --> 00:04:08,346 we need to get off. Get ready. 94 00:04:08,346 --> 00:04:11,066 And jump! Jump! Jump! Can't! Fuck it. 95 00:04:11,066 --> 00:04:12,586 Come on. Ok? 96 00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,506 Andrea screams 97 00:04:15,587 --> 00:04:17,147 Andrea, stay there. 98 00:04:18,387 --> 00:04:20,787 Get her up on the bed. Knee-elbow position, 99 00:04:20,787 --> 00:04:22,587 replace the cord, get her round to theatre. 100 00:04:22,587 --> 00:04:24,787 I'm going to change into some scrubs. You consent her. 101 00:04:24,787 --> 00:04:27,427 Consent her for...? A deep-tissue massage. 102 00:04:27,427 --> 00:04:29,267 It's a cord prolapse! 103 00:04:29,267 --> 00:04:31,507 Caesarean! Oh, well, when you say, 104 00:04:31,507 --> 00:04:34,067 "knee-elbow position"... 105 00:04:34,067 --> 00:04:35,427 My mistake, sorry. 106 00:04:35,427 --> 00:04:37,507 Your outfit looks a lot like what the doctors wear. 107 00:04:37,507 --> 00:04:38,867 Andrea screams 108 00:04:38,867 --> 00:04:40,147 I'll do this. You push the bed. 109 00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:41,507 Get up on here. That's it. 110 00:04:44,828 --> 00:04:46,308 A bit less alton towers. 111 00:04:46,308 --> 00:04:47,948 I'm so sorry. 112 00:04:47,948 --> 00:04:49,548 Why don't I drive? 113 00:04:49,548 --> 00:04:51,028 You go and find the anaesthetist. 114 00:04:51,028 --> 00:04:53,068 That's the doctor that makes you go sleep-sleep. 115 00:04:53,068 --> 00:04:54,748 She groans 116 00:04:54,748 --> 00:04:56,068 I've found the husband. 117 00:04:56,068 --> 00:04:57,588 He's just coming up from reception. 118 00:04:57,588 --> 00:05:00,428 Ok, Andrea, this is going to be fine. You'll have a baby 119 00:05:00,428 --> 00:05:03,428 in five minutes. And is free? Yep, free. Completely free. 120 00:05:03,428 --> 00:05:05,108 We're not even allowed to accept tips. 121 00:05:05,108 --> 00:05:06,628 She gasps 122 00:05:06,628 --> 00:05:08,828 dr Adam, you should see me next. It's really urgent. 123 00:05:08,828 --> 00:05:11,268 Really? Erika, darling, can you just take a seat for me, please? 124 00:05:11,268 --> 00:05:14,828 Tracy! How was majorca? Did Mick like the hotel? 125 00:05:14,829 --> 00:05:16,509 Erika, just go back to triage. 126 00:05:16,509 --> 00:05:18,029 He speaks Romanian 127 00:05:18,029 --> 00:05:19,749 I did explain that the doctor would be 128 00:05:19,749 --> 00:05:21,909 - holding the cord inside. - He speaks Romanian. 129 00:05:21,910 --> 00:05:24,390 Probably didn't tell him I'd be wearing her like Kermit the frog. 130 00:05:24,389 --> 00:05:25,789 I don't understand. 131 00:05:25,789 --> 00:05:30,109 That's baby's heartbeat. Welcome to the nhs. 132 00:05:30,109 --> 00:05:32,509 Andrea cries out 133 00:05:32,509 --> 00:05:34,509 baby cries 134 00:05:39,389 --> 00:05:40,949 this is obs and gynae. 135 00:05:41,950 --> 00:05:43,470 Also known as brats and twats. 136 00:05:45,390 --> 00:05:47,630 You're generally sailing the ship alone... 137 00:05:48,670 --> 00:05:51,350 A ship that's massive and on fire and no-one's had 138 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:52,990 the time to teach you how to sail. 139 00:05:54,350 --> 00:05:56,670 It's literally life or death here. 140 00:05:56,670 --> 00:05:59,870 And you're constantly being splashed by bodily fluids. 141 00:05:59,870 --> 00:06:01,710 Not even the fun kind. 142 00:06:05,070 --> 00:06:08,230 But what other doctors can say they end up with twice the number of 143 00:06:08,230 --> 00:06:10,350 patients they started with? 144 00:06:10,351 --> 00:06:12,311 Beat that, geriatrics. 145 00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,671 Clothes bill means I'm... 146 00:06:16,671 --> 00:06:18,911 Probably running my job at a loss, though. 147 00:06:31,831 --> 00:06:34,791 Ah, mr Lockhart. Having fun there? 148 00:06:34,791 --> 00:06:38,191 I was just... yeah, I'm not entirely convinced I want to know. 149 00:06:38,191 --> 00:06:40,271 I don't know if you heard, there was a massive 150 00:06:40,272 --> 00:06:41,872 cord prolapse before. 151 00:06:41,872 --> 00:06:44,632 Erm, crash section. Got the baby out in 90 seconds. 152 00:06:44,632 --> 00:06:47,232 I heard that you rocked up ten minutes late, 153 00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,792 nearly killed a patient in the maintenance lift, 154 00:06:49,792 --> 00:06:52,912 then did a caesarean section in casualwear. 155 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:54,792 It was more that I took a short cut. 156 00:06:54,792 --> 00:06:57,272 Doctors aren't meant to take short cuts, Adam. 157 00:06:57,272 --> 00:06:59,392 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar? 158 00:06:59,392 --> 00:07:02,632 Can you try acting like a bloody registrar? 159 00:07:02,632 --> 00:07:05,192 I'll be in my office if you need me, 160 00:07:05,192 --> 00:07:07,272 which I strongly suggest you won't. 161 00:07:09,633 --> 00:07:10,833 You've missed a bit. 162 00:07:15,193 --> 00:07:18,153 Screaming 163 00:07:20,913 --> 00:07:22,913 mind out, please, mind out. 164 00:07:32,833 --> 00:07:36,233 It's really urgent! I know, petal, but I promise you 165 00:07:36,233 --> 00:07:37,953 the doctor won't be long. Pinkie promise? 166 00:07:37,954 --> 00:07:40,154 Pinkie promise with a little cherry on top. 167 00:07:40,154 --> 00:07:41,954 Oh! 168 00:07:41,954 --> 00:07:44,514 Why don't you head back to where you were sitting? 169 00:07:47,314 --> 00:07:50,114 Moany old trout. Morning, Ria. Morning, dr Kay. 170 00:07:50,114 --> 00:07:52,234 Oh, there he is! Ward round, trace? 171 00:07:52,234 --> 00:07:54,194 Can I ask you something personal, darling? 172 00:07:54,194 --> 00:07:56,034 Is it, "why do you look like shit this morning?" 173 00:07:56,034 --> 00:07:57,394 I wasn't going to ask it like that. 174 00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:58,794 I slept in my car last night. 175 00:07:58,794 --> 00:08:02,554 Well, it must be hard maintaining a relationship, 176 00:08:02,554 --> 00:08:04,354 what, with your job... 177 00:08:04,354 --> 00:08:06,874 And your personality. 178 00:08:06,875 --> 00:08:09,425 Tracy's the head midwife on today. 179 00:08:09,435 --> 00:08:11,595 I'd let her sew up my sister's perineum... 180 00:08:12,715 --> 00:08:14,465 Which sounds weird, now that I've said it, 181 00:08:14,475 --> 00:08:16,265 but it's actually the highest compliment I can give. 182 00:08:16,275 --> 00:08:18,745 Oh, remember to remove the thick, shiny layer on the outside. 183 00:08:18,755 --> 00:08:21,985 Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to her senses and dumped him. 184 00:08:21,995 --> 00:08:24,785 No-one's dumped anyone. But if you do want to smack him, 185 00:08:24,795 --> 00:08:26,585 I will turn a blind eye. 186 00:08:26,595 --> 00:08:28,745 Do you mind if we nip to room 8 first? 187 00:08:28,755 --> 00:08:31,225 She's making pretty slow progress. 188 00:08:31,235 --> 00:08:34,265 Pop downstairs and review mrs buckstar quickly. 189 00:08:34,275 --> 00:08:36,715 Doctors speak a lot of code, so it's "epididymo-orchitis" 190 00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:38,916 rather than "gammy cock and balls". 191 00:08:38,916 --> 00:08:40,796 "Review mrs buckstar," "go to Starbucks." 192 00:08:40,796 --> 00:08:42,236 Which ward is mrs buckstar in? 193 00:08:42,236 --> 00:08:44,716 He wants you to get him a fancy coffee without me knowing. 194 00:08:44,716 --> 00:08:47,276 Phone vibrating milk and one sugar for me, please. 195 00:08:54,636 --> 00:08:57,636 I'm in labour, mother, not quadriplegic. 196 00:08:57,636 --> 00:09:00,476 Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors. 197 00:09:00,476 --> 00:09:03,036 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. 198 00:09:03,036 --> 00:09:04,676 You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong. 199 00:09:08,317 --> 00:09:09,877 Would you like a sweetie, dear? 200 00:09:09,877 --> 00:09:12,077 The doctor's not going to give me better care 201 00:09:12,077 --> 00:09:15,517 because you offer him a Murray mint. In fairness, I might, actually. 202 00:09:19,277 --> 00:09:20,957 All right? 203 00:09:24,117 --> 00:09:26,277 You've got a little bit stuck at six centimetres, 204 00:09:26,277 --> 00:09:27,877 so I suggest we wang the dose up 205 00:09:27,877 --> 00:09:29,997 on the drip that's helping your contractions... 206 00:09:29,997 --> 00:09:31,757 Is "wang" a medical term? Sure is. 207 00:09:31,757 --> 00:09:33,917 And if that doesn't work, we'll, erm... 208 00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:39,798 Anna, let's put the synto onto 84 and re-examine in four hours. 209 00:09:39,798 --> 00:09:41,718 It won't be me, actually. I'll be home by then. 210 00:09:41,718 --> 00:09:43,678 Really? Well, I've been here 15 hours. 211 00:09:43,678 --> 00:09:46,798 If I stay any longer, they'll start charging me council tax. 212 00:09:46,798 --> 00:09:48,958 Right. Don't worry, darling, 213 00:09:48,958 --> 00:09:51,958 I'll do it, so at least it'll be a familiar face. 214 00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:53,958 Could you do the examination instead, doctor? 215 00:09:53,958 --> 00:09:57,198 It does make more sense for Tracy to do it. 216 00:09:57,198 --> 00:09:59,718 - Where did you train? - Would you like me to pop home 217 00:09:59,718 --> 00:10:01,238 and get my degree certificates? 218 00:10:01,238 --> 00:10:03,558 There's no way you could stay, is there? 219 00:10:03,559 --> 00:10:06,559 Erm, I'm not sure I like where this is going. 220 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:08,159 You're not saying I can't choose who 221 00:10:08,159 --> 00:10:10,119 does intimate examinations on me, are you? 222 00:10:10,119 --> 00:10:12,679 I'm saying you won't be choosing based on the colour of their skin. 223 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:16,879 Adam! What? When did anyone say anything about skin colour? 224 00:10:16,879 --> 00:10:18,399 It's called patient choice. 225 00:10:18,399 --> 00:10:20,839 It's important to have choice, like tonight I might... 226 00:10:20,839 --> 00:10:24,119 Choose to order a pizza rather than firebomb a mosque. 227 00:10:24,119 --> 00:10:25,799 I think what dr Kay meant to say... 228 00:10:25,799 --> 00:10:28,559 What I'm saying is, I know it's stressful being on labour ward, 229 00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:30,839 but anything more like this, and I will have to have you 230 00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:32,679 removed from the building. Is that understood? 231 00:10:32,680 --> 00:10:36,400 Ok. Ok, let's crack on, shall we? 232 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,480 Wanker. 233 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,240 That had better be a crossword answer. 234 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,600 No, dear, she called you a wanker. 235 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:49,760 What the hell was all that about? 236 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:52,440 I guess white supremacists have babies, too. 237 00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:54,200 Not her. You. 238 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:57,680 Me? I don't need a white knight to defend my honour. 239 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,200 Hang on. I'm the registrar. 240 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,800 Acting registrar. 241 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,680 I'm the most senior doctor here. Until somebody more senior turns up. 242 00:11:03,681 --> 00:11:07,961 Well, I'm running this ward now, and it's up to me... no, I'm running 243 00:11:07,961 --> 00:11:10,121 this ward, young man, and I'm more than capable 244 00:11:10,121 --> 00:11:12,241 of handling myself, and the moment that I can't, 245 00:11:12,241 --> 00:11:13,881 I'll let somebody know, 246 00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:17,401 and I don't want to spoil the surprise - it won't be you. 247 00:11:17,401 --> 00:11:20,041 And don't tell the patients that you're kicking them out. 248 00:11:20,041 --> 00:11:22,321 This is the nhs, not your golf club. 249 00:11:22,321 --> 00:11:23,961 Which room are we kicking out? 250 00:11:23,961 --> 00:11:25,361 - Phone buzzes. - No, we're not kicking. 251 00:11:25,364 --> 00:11:27,324 Anybody out, benilda. They're all in labour, 252 00:11:27,321 --> 00:11:29,721 so we thought we might wait until they had their babies. 253 00:11:29,721 --> 00:11:31,321 Well, get a move on. 254 00:11:31,322 --> 00:11:33,282 The hospital's on red alert for beds. 255 00:11:33,282 --> 00:11:35,442 We're actually more than halfway to black alert. 256 00:11:35,442 --> 00:11:38,002 So, like, dusky-Merlot alert. 257 00:11:40,042 --> 00:11:42,282 Can you, er, go to gynae? 258 00:11:42,282 --> 00:11:44,002 The lady in bed 17's fit for home. 259 00:11:44,002 --> 00:11:46,602 I'm actually in the middle of a ward round. 260 00:11:46,602 --> 00:11:49,002 But, yeah, I mean, I'll find a moment. 261 00:11:49,002 --> 00:11:50,642 Before you do that, you'll need to 262 00:11:50,642 --> 00:11:52,642 fill out an incident form for room 8. Hang on, 263 00:11:52,642 --> 00:11:55,082 I didn't have to do one for the cord prolapse. 264 00:11:57,082 --> 00:11:59,522 Alarm blares. 265 00:12:05,723 --> 00:12:07,923 - Erika? - Third attendance this week 266 00:12:07,923 --> 00:12:10,443 - with non-specific symptoms. - Alarm stops. 267 00:12:10,446 --> 00:12:13,436 Ok, everybody, back to your jobs. We don't need the polyphonic spree. 268 00:12:13,443 --> 00:12:16,083 Shoo, shoo. Oh. Come on. 269 00:12:17,643 --> 00:12:19,923 Not you! 270 00:12:19,923 --> 00:12:22,043 Oh! Oh, god, I'm so sorry. 271 00:12:23,163 --> 00:12:26,283 Right, surprise me. What's the management? 272 00:12:26,283 --> 00:12:28,203 Right. Er... 273 00:12:28,203 --> 00:12:30,763 Ok, well, I would, erm... 274 00:12:30,764 --> 00:12:32,564 Check for a patent airway, 275 00:12:32,564 --> 00:12:34,204 er, then I would put her 276 00:12:34,204 --> 00:12:37,404 in the left lateral position, run high oxygen flow 277 00:12:37,404 --> 00:12:40,124 through a non-rebreather mask, erm, check for 278 00:12:40,124 --> 00:12:41,404 a pulse... 279 00:12:41,404 --> 00:12:43,644 So near and yet so shit. 280 00:12:45,244 --> 00:12:47,444 So, when people are really unconscious... 281 00:12:49,884 --> 00:12:51,924 Their hands smash into their faces. 282 00:12:55,324 --> 00:12:58,214 Phone buzzes. 283 00:13:00,845 --> 00:13:02,875 Adam? 284 00:13:02,885 --> 00:13:04,005 Adam! 285 00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:06,795 Adam? 286 00:13:06,805 --> 00:13:08,715 Do you think I'm rubbish? 287 00:13:08,725 --> 00:13:10,995 Look, I wasn't great on my first week, either. 288 00:13:11,005 --> 00:13:12,965 I've been here two months! 289 00:13:16,125 --> 00:13:18,275 Two months? Well, I just haven't had a chance 290 00:13:18,285 --> 00:13:20,435 to do much hands-on stuff yet. 291 00:13:20,445 --> 00:13:22,075 How many babies have you delivered? 292 00:13:22,085 --> 00:13:23,595 Erm... 293 00:13:23,605 --> 00:13:25,555 No babies have needed delivery in two months? 294 00:13:25,565 --> 00:13:27,565 Everyone's always too busy to teach me. 295 00:13:27,566 --> 00:13:29,326 You just need to be less of a wallflower. 296 00:13:29,326 --> 00:13:30,886 It's dog eat dog in this place. 297 00:13:31,966 --> 00:13:33,206 And... 298 00:13:34,206 --> 00:13:35,606 The dogs eat wallflowers. 299 00:13:37,646 --> 00:13:40,246 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I've been elbow-deep in a patient, 300 00:13:40,246 --> 00:13:43,646 I've had an ethnostate in room 8 and someone else playing dead. 301 00:13:43,646 --> 00:13:45,806 Oh, and I've got blood matted into my pubes. 302 00:13:45,806 --> 00:13:47,446 I love it when you talk dirty. 303 00:13:47,446 --> 00:13:49,046 Right, so, who did you say you were? 304 00:13:49,046 --> 00:13:50,726 My name's Harry. 305 00:13:50,726 --> 00:13:52,606 When you called my mother. 306 00:13:52,606 --> 00:13:54,406 I said I was your fuck buddy. 307 00:13:56,607 --> 00:13:57,967 I said I was your flatmate. 308 00:13:57,967 --> 00:13:59,847 But she knows we've only got one bedroom. 309 00:13:59,847 --> 00:14:02,287 Wild idea, but you know you could just... Tell her about us? 310 00:14:02,287 --> 00:14:04,567 You don't know her. She'll turn you into stone, or something. 311 00:14:04,567 --> 00:14:07,367 Nah. Mums love me. It's like my superpower. 312 00:14:07,367 --> 00:14:09,207 How are we going to fake our own deaths, 313 00:14:09,207 --> 00:14:10,607 then, before Greg's stag do? 314 00:14:10,607 --> 00:14:12,487 I'm thinking avalanche, helicopter crash... 315 00:14:12,487 --> 00:14:15,087 Ah, it'll be a laugh. Carbon-monoxide poisoning? 316 00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:17,087 - Pager beeps. - Shouldn't you pop along, 317 00:14:17,088 --> 00:14:19,488 Seeing as you're the best man? Crap. I was meant to go to gynae. 318 00:14:19,487 --> 00:14:21,367 Sorry, call you later. Don't apologise. 319 00:14:21,367 --> 00:14:23,007 That's the longest call we've had in months. 320 00:14:23,007 --> 00:14:24,647 I was starting to get bored. 321 00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,248 ♪ No-no, no, no 322 00:14:29,248 --> 00:14:30,968 ♪ no-no-no, no, no-no, no 323 00:14:30,968 --> 00:14:32,568 ♪ no, no-no 324 00:14:32,568 --> 00:14:34,168 ♪ no, no, no-no 325 00:14:34,168 --> 00:14:35,608 ♪ no-no, no, no 326 00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:37,128 ♪ no-no, no, no 327 00:14:37,128 --> 00:14:39,008 ♪ no-no, no, no-no, no 328 00:14:39,008 --> 00:14:41,488 ♪ nobody can do the ♪ shing-a-ling... ♪ 329 00:14:41,488 --> 00:14:42,888 Erm, good news, mrs w. 330 00:14:42,888 --> 00:14:45,088 You are finally free to go home. 331 00:14:47,568 --> 00:14:49,608 Are you stupid? 332 00:14:50,928 --> 00:14:53,528 I was told you were good to go, but, yeah, you don't look great. 333 00:14:53,528 --> 00:14:55,088 Speak for yourself. 334 00:14:55,089 --> 00:14:56,489 Pager beeps 335 00:14:56,489 --> 00:14:58,969 erm, must have been a bit of a mix-up. 336 00:14:58,969 --> 00:15:01,609 I'll come back later. I need to see someone else now. 337 00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:03,209 Hopefully a hairdresser. 338 00:15:04,409 --> 00:15:06,049 ♪ Skate ♪ like I do 339 00:15:06,049 --> 00:15:08,449 ♪ nobody can do ♪ boogaloo 340 00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:09,489 ♪ like I do 341 00:15:09,489 --> 00:15:10,969 ♪ nobody can do ♪ Philly 342 00:15:10,969 --> 00:15:12,489 ♪ like I do 343 00:15:12,489 --> 00:15:15,929 ♪ well, don't you know I'm gonna skate right through... ♪ 344 00:15:15,929 --> 00:15:17,489 Dr Kay, you're needed in room 4. 345 00:15:17,489 --> 00:15:18,889 Yes, I know... 346 00:15:19,929 --> 00:15:21,649 ♪ when I go to Philly, I do 347 00:15:21,649 --> 00:15:23,809 ♪ ain't nobody doin' it but me, babe 348 00:15:23,810 --> 00:15:25,210 ♪ nobody but me 349 00:15:25,210 --> 00:15:27,050 ♪ well, let me tell you, nobody 350 00:15:27,050 --> 00:15:28,410 groaning 351 00:15:28,410 --> 00:15:31,370 ♪ but nobody but me 352 00:15:31,370 --> 00:15:32,970 ♪ let me tell you, nobody 353 00:15:32,970 --> 00:15:35,930 ♪ nobody nobody... 354 00:15:35,930 --> 00:15:39,010 Never actually let the patient see the forceps. 355 00:15:39,010 --> 00:15:41,770 The only people happy with two-foot-long metal salad tongs 356 00:15:41,770 --> 00:15:43,970 inserted in their vaginas are people who aren't aware 357 00:15:43,970 --> 00:15:46,050 that there are two-foot-long metal salad tongs 358 00:15:46,050 --> 00:15:47,290 inserted in their vaginas. 359 00:15:47,290 --> 00:15:51,050 It's only a few more minutes. Shut up, Graham! 360 00:15:51,050 --> 00:15:53,170 And put your shirt back on. Just breathe. 361 00:15:53,171 --> 00:15:55,171 - That's what's important. - She groans. 362 00:15:55,174 --> 00:15:57,254 You're doing so good. 363 00:15:57,251 --> 00:15:59,571 You're doing so well. 364 00:15:59,571 --> 00:16:01,811 You're doing so well, my little soldier! 365 00:16:01,811 --> 00:16:04,731 Shut up, Graham. I'm going to play the song now. 366 00:16:06,051 --> 00:16:07,591 Gentle music plays 367 00:16:07,592 --> 00:16:09,132 seen one before? Yes... 368 00:16:09,131 --> 00:16:10,971 See one, do one, teach one. 369 00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:12,531 I don't like this song. 370 00:16:12,531 --> 00:16:13,931 Change the song, change the song. 371 00:16:15,851 --> 00:16:17,851 Wait for a contraction. 372 00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:19,131 And pull. 373 00:16:19,131 --> 00:16:20,731 You got to keep breathing. 374 00:16:20,731 --> 00:16:22,051 Patient cries out 375 00:16:22,052 --> 00:16:24,292 just find your centre, baby. 376 00:16:24,292 --> 00:16:25,652 No stress. Graham... 377 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:28,052 Phone buzzes 378 00:16:28,052 --> 00:16:30,572 dr Kay speaking. It's Greg. You've not answered 379 00:16:30,572 --> 00:16:32,812 any emails in four days. No-one even knows where we're meeting. 380 00:16:32,812 --> 00:16:36,212 Push, push, push, push, push! Pull as hard as you can! Now! 381 00:16:36,212 --> 00:16:37,932 Oh, god, tell me you're not having sex. 382 00:16:37,932 --> 00:16:40,332 Just on labour ward right now. I know it's traditional 383 00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,652 for the best man to humiliate the groom on his stag do, 384 00:16:42,652 --> 00:16:45,612 and traditionally that involves handcuffs and a sex worker... 385 00:16:45,612 --> 00:16:47,172 Just put some oomph into it. 386 00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:49,452 Welly's threatening to take over and drag us all to a strip club. 387 00:16:49,452 --> 00:16:51,332 No, no, no, we won't be going to... Breast clinic. 388 00:16:51,333 --> 00:16:53,293 If this doesn't work, will we have to do a caesarean? 389 00:16:53,293 --> 00:16:56,893 It will work. Erm, look, it's all going to be civilised, don't worry. 390 00:16:56,893 --> 00:16:59,373 You say, "don't worry," but you'll understand why I am still worried. 391 00:16:59,373 --> 00:17:01,893 Tell everyone 8 o'clock upstairs at the crown. 392 00:17:01,893 --> 00:17:04,253 I'll see you later. I really need to get back to this vagina. 393 00:17:04,253 --> 00:17:06,573 Yeah, well, you're definitely not having sex, then. 394 00:17:06,573 --> 00:17:08,373 You got to stay breathing, ok? 395 00:17:08,373 --> 00:17:10,253 That's it, that's it. You're doing brilliantly. 396 00:17:10,253 --> 00:17:11,973 Thanks. I was talking to the patient. 397 00:17:11,973 --> 00:17:14,933 Nice and slowly, nice and slowly. Don't let her tear. 398 00:17:14,933 --> 00:17:17,733 You're so beautiful! Graham, just stop. 399 00:17:17,733 --> 00:17:19,093 Nice and slowly, nice and... 400 00:17:19,093 --> 00:17:22,493 Dad, do you want to come down and see baby being born? 401 00:17:22,494 --> 00:17:25,614 Oh, my god, where's its face?! What's the matter with his face?! 402 00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:27,774 Patient screams 403 00:17:27,774 --> 00:17:28,834 baby cries 404 00:17:28,835 --> 00:17:29,885 his face is fine. 405 00:17:29,894 --> 00:17:31,854 Just on the front of his head, not the back. 406 00:17:31,854 --> 00:17:34,134 Remember I said, "don't let her tear"? 407 00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:49,804 Adam's a good name. 408 00:17:49,796 --> 00:17:51,256 He chuckles 409 00:17:54,815 --> 00:17:56,725 you've got a bit of a tear going into the back passage. 410 00:17:56,735 --> 00:17:58,605 We'll get you round to theatre, 411 00:17:58,615 --> 00:18:01,365 and have that repaired nicely for you. 412 00:18:01,375 --> 00:18:03,375 Won't take more than an hour or so. 413 00:18:28,576 --> 00:18:30,016 He clears throat. 414 00:18:38,456 --> 00:18:40,136 She sniffs. 415 00:18:43,616 --> 00:18:46,256 Adam, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've sewn it up myself. 416 00:18:46,256 --> 00:18:48,336 I've just never actually done it... It's fine. 417 00:18:48,337 --> 00:18:50,377 Besides, my genitals were wondering why 418 00:18:50,377 --> 00:18:52,417 they hadn't been covered in blood for a few hours. 419 00:18:58,457 --> 00:19:00,217 Better do an incident form. 420 00:19:00,217 --> 00:19:02,097 How are we doing here, then? 421 00:19:02,097 --> 00:19:03,617 All under control, mr Lockhart. 422 00:19:03,617 --> 00:19:05,377 Miracles never cease. Could you just have... 423 00:19:05,377 --> 00:19:07,537 I thought I told you to discharge that gynae patient. 424 00:19:07,537 --> 00:19:08,937 I see the miracles have ceased. 425 00:19:08,937 --> 00:19:10,297 No. But she's not even... 426 00:19:10,297 --> 00:19:12,937 Are my team causing you trouble, ms mendoza? 427 00:19:12,937 --> 00:19:14,417 We're full on labour ward. 428 00:19:14,417 --> 00:19:17,097 Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae. I don't know how we're supposed 429 00:19:17,098 --> 00:19:18,818 to admit anyone from aande. 430 00:19:18,818 --> 00:19:21,658 We've been on red alert all day, and we're practically at black alert. 431 00:19:21,658 --> 00:19:23,218 Burgundy alert, then. 432 00:19:23,219 --> 00:19:24,779 All laugh 433 00:19:24,778 --> 00:19:26,978 I'm sure we can do something about that for you. 434 00:19:26,978 --> 00:19:29,298 Can't we, dr Kay? Yeah, we could pull out 435 00:19:29,298 --> 00:19:31,538 the patient's drips, and Chuck her out the window. 436 00:19:31,538 --> 00:19:33,098 I knew you'd think of something. 437 00:19:33,098 --> 00:19:35,538 Leave it with us. Can I help at all? 438 00:19:35,538 --> 00:19:37,538 You could pop down to the coffee shop. 439 00:19:37,538 --> 00:19:39,298 There's a vacancy for a barista. 440 00:19:39,298 --> 00:19:42,698 Shruti did her first forcep delivery earlier. 441 00:19:42,698 --> 00:19:44,098 Er, yeah, yeah. 442 00:19:44,098 --> 00:19:46,418 She had been in second stage for over an hour, and we... 443 00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:48,619 Very good. Walk with me, Adam. 444 00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:52,499 Quick story for you. 445 00:19:52,499 --> 00:19:54,619 So, there's this acting obstetric registrar, 446 00:19:54,619 --> 00:19:59,419 and he walks into a room and he calls his patient a Nazi. 447 00:19:59,419 --> 00:20:01,579 Oh, you're making it so much worse than it was. 448 00:20:01,579 --> 00:20:03,899 She was being racist to Tracy... Every mother and baby 449 00:20:03,899 --> 00:20:06,419 on this ward is relying on your good decisions, 450 00:20:06,419 --> 00:20:09,339 and your good judgment. Apologise to Tracy, 451 00:20:09,339 --> 00:20:11,099 apologise to the patient, 452 00:20:11,099 --> 00:20:12,819 and send some people home. 453 00:20:14,699 --> 00:20:16,019 Oh, and, Adam? 454 00:20:16,020 --> 00:20:17,900 Stop being shit. 455 00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,700 ♪ You hit me once I hit you back 456 00:20:19,700 --> 00:20:21,140 pager beeps 457 00:20:21,140 --> 00:20:22,820 ♪ you gave a kick I gave a slap 458 00:20:22,820 --> 00:20:26,780 ♪ you smashed a plate over my head then I set fire to our bed 459 00:20:29,260 --> 00:20:32,540 ♪ you hit me once I hit you back... ♪ 460 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,260 Rachel glover? 461 00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:35,660 Kerry Salisbury? 462 00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:38,900 Caroline morobeto? 463 00:20:42,220 --> 00:20:44,940 ♪ Oh, my black eye casts no shadow 464 00:20:44,941 --> 00:20:47,461 ♪ your red eye sees no blame 465 00:20:47,461 --> 00:20:49,781 ♪ your slaps don't stick your kicks don't hit 466 00:20:49,781 --> 00:20:51,581 ♪ so we remain the same 467 00:20:51,581 --> 00:20:53,781 ♪ blood sticks, sweat drips 468 00:20:53,781 --> 00:20:55,981 ♪ break the lock if it don't fit 469 00:20:55,981 --> 00:20:58,181 ♪ a kick in the teeth is good for some 470 00:20:58,181 --> 00:21:00,381 ♪ a kiss with a fist is better than none 471 00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,341 ♪ whoa 472 00:21:04,341 --> 00:21:07,461 ♪ a kiss with a fist is better than none. ♪ 473 00:21:10,581 --> 00:21:14,341 So, you've recovered from earlier. 474 00:21:14,342 --> 00:21:16,622 Oh, yes. Oh, god, sorry, dr Adam. 475 00:21:16,622 --> 00:21:17,982 I don't know what came over me. 476 00:21:17,982 --> 00:21:19,902 So, remind me, how many weeks are you? 477 00:21:19,902 --> 00:21:22,222 Oh, god, I hate maths. 478 00:21:22,222 --> 00:21:25,622 I couldn't even tell you in months. Er... 479 00:21:25,622 --> 00:21:27,382 Erm, ok, let's think. 480 00:21:27,382 --> 00:21:30,342 So... birthday's in June. 481 00:21:30,342 --> 00:21:31,462 I'll be 27... 482 00:21:33,462 --> 00:21:36,102 Well, it's got to be, like, 2,000 weeks? 483 00:21:37,462 --> 00:21:39,142 You're 25 weeks. 484 00:21:40,502 --> 00:21:42,342 Oh! 485 00:21:42,343 --> 00:21:43,743 You mean the baby. 486 00:21:43,743 --> 00:21:46,263 She laughs 487 00:21:46,263 --> 00:21:50,023 so, erm, what's the... Problem? 488 00:21:50,023 --> 00:21:54,263 Well, I woke up this morning with a headache, 489 00:21:54,263 --> 00:21:58,303 and my tongue is just, like, totally covered in spots. 490 00:21:58,303 --> 00:22:00,103 Right. Let's have a look. 491 00:22:04,423 --> 00:22:06,143 Ok. 492 00:22:08,783 --> 00:22:12,583 I'm afraid that what you have is known as... 493 00:22:12,584 --> 00:22:14,384 Taste buds. 494 00:22:16,824 --> 00:22:18,084 Oh. 495 00:22:18,085 --> 00:22:19,335 She laughs 496 00:22:22,304 --> 00:22:24,544 so, is there someone at home we can call 497 00:22:24,544 --> 00:22:26,304 to come and collect you, 498 00:22:26,304 --> 00:22:28,384 or do you live here now? 499 00:22:28,384 --> 00:22:30,864 Oh, god, no, who'd want to live with me? 500 00:22:32,984 --> 00:22:34,904 Pager beeps 501 00:22:34,904 --> 00:22:36,424 right. 502 00:22:41,425 --> 00:22:44,375 Adam, that lady you just saw, her blood pressure's a bit high. 503 00:22:44,385 --> 00:22:47,015 Do you want me to send her for some bloods? Just send her home. 504 00:22:47,025 --> 00:22:50,225 No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods. 505 00:22:51,625 --> 00:22:53,185 Yep? 506 00:22:54,545 --> 00:22:56,225 What's the trace like? 507 00:22:58,705 --> 00:23:00,945 Isn't the evening registrar here yet? 508 00:23:03,505 --> 00:23:05,655 Ok. Fine. 509 00:23:05,665 --> 00:23:07,895 Right, we're doing a caesarean for room 8. 510 00:23:07,905 --> 00:23:10,745 Dr Adam? Dr Adam, sorry, sorry, I meant to say. 511 00:23:10,746 --> 00:23:13,066 My teeth have become a bit itchy. 512 00:23:13,066 --> 00:23:14,546 Send her home. 513 00:23:15,626 --> 00:23:17,706 Don't ask to do it. I'm tired. 514 00:23:17,706 --> 00:23:19,306 I need to be gone ten minutes ago. 515 00:23:19,306 --> 00:23:20,946 Erm, so, we're all good to go. 516 00:23:20,946 --> 00:23:22,506 We'll have baby out in five minutes, 517 00:23:22,506 --> 00:23:26,026 and may I just say, I misspoke before 518 00:23:26,026 --> 00:23:29,226 and I'm very sorry. All water under the bridge. 519 00:23:29,226 --> 00:23:31,226 But just checking it will be you doing this operation 520 00:23:31,226 --> 00:23:33,066 and nobody else. 521 00:23:34,986 --> 00:23:36,706 Yes. 522 00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:38,346 Yes, it will. Yeah. 523 00:23:44,027 --> 00:23:47,387 Actually, fuck it. You've got to learn some time. You're up. 524 00:23:47,387 --> 00:23:49,267 Come on, you've seen one. Y-Yeah... 525 00:23:49,267 --> 00:23:52,067 So you know the routine. See one, fuck one up, teach one. 526 00:23:52,067 --> 00:23:54,867 Really? Thank you. 527 00:23:54,867 --> 00:23:57,467 Are you sure? Not especially. Come on. 528 00:24:05,787 --> 00:24:07,307 Are you happy? 529 00:24:09,668 --> 00:24:11,228 Right, come on. 530 00:24:13,428 --> 00:24:15,468 This it? Yeah. Hurry up, please, 531 00:24:15,468 --> 00:24:17,908 I think the anaesthetist's retiring next week. 532 00:24:22,748 --> 00:24:24,548 Adam? Mm? 533 00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:27,028 Stretch it. Come on. Harder than that. 534 00:24:27,028 --> 00:24:28,908 Right, through the peritoneum, then. 535 00:24:30,948 --> 00:24:33,548 Pop your finger in. You're not going to damage anything. 536 00:24:33,548 --> 00:24:35,708 Ok. 537 00:24:35,708 --> 00:24:37,148 Oh! 538 00:24:40,669 --> 00:24:43,109 Adam? Adam? 539 00:24:43,109 --> 00:24:45,789 Er, yeah, ok, good. Great. So, you're going to make 540 00:24:45,789 --> 00:24:48,349 a u-shape in the lower segment of the uterus, 541 00:24:48,349 --> 00:24:50,349 and then you're going to extend it with your fingers. 542 00:24:50,349 --> 00:24:51,949 What if there isn't a lower segment? 543 00:24:51,949 --> 00:24:54,189 You know, like if it's before 32 weeks. 544 00:24:54,189 --> 00:24:56,389 Yeah, we usually save the qanda session for afterwards. 545 00:24:56,389 --> 00:24:59,069 It would just be a horrible, bloody mess. Come on, get on with it. 546 00:24:59,069 --> 00:25:00,949 Is that...? Good. 547 00:25:00,949 --> 00:25:02,469 Now what? 548 00:25:02,469 --> 00:25:04,669 I think even you can guess what happens next. Come on. 549 00:25:04,669 --> 00:25:06,349 That's it. 550 00:25:06,350 --> 00:25:08,390 Just guide the head out. It's coming. 551 00:25:09,910 --> 00:25:11,390 Ok. 552 00:25:12,950 --> 00:25:14,350 That's it. 553 00:25:16,070 --> 00:25:18,790 One baby coming up... 554 00:25:18,790 --> 00:25:20,430 Baby cries 555 00:25:23,830 --> 00:25:26,070 no, get her off me. I'm not having a paki 556 00:25:26,070 --> 00:25:28,150 delivering my baby! Get her off me! 557 00:25:28,150 --> 00:25:31,630 Stop touching it! You promised that you would do it! 558 00:25:31,630 --> 00:25:34,270 Excuse me, get me out of this! Take this! 559 00:25:34,270 --> 00:25:35,990 What is this? Get this off me! 560 00:25:35,991 --> 00:25:38,311 Adolf's a good name. Mum, will you do something?! 561 00:25:40,631 --> 00:25:42,071 You did really well. 562 00:25:43,351 --> 00:25:45,671 One caesarean down, 8,000 to go. 563 00:25:46,871 --> 00:25:49,471 To be fair, they don't normally end like that. 564 00:25:49,471 --> 00:25:52,791 Erm, write up the notes and mention that I closed the skin. 565 00:25:56,271 --> 00:25:58,831 Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful? 566 00:26:12,192 --> 00:26:13,832 Oh, for... 567 00:26:16,392 --> 00:26:18,472 Phone rings 568 00:26:19,792 --> 00:26:21,272 cancellations hotline. 569 00:26:21,272 --> 00:26:23,872 Press 1 for you need to stay at work, leaving me to make 570 00:26:23,872 --> 00:26:28,032 small talk with 20 public-school dickheads I barely know. 571 00:26:28,032 --> 00:26:31,152 That's unfair. There's only 15 of them. 572 00:26:31,152 --> 00:26:32,592 And I'm just leaving now. 573 00:26:32,592 --> 00:26:35,872 No way! Can you bring a change of clothes, please? 574 00:26:35,873 --> 00:26:38,313 Yeah. Anything in particular? 575 00:26:38,313 --> 00:26:39,513 Erm, something smart-casual 576 00:26:39,513 --> 00:26:42,313 and not totally encrusted with a stranger's blood? 577 00:26:42,313 --> 00:26:44,313 Hula skirt and feather boa it is, then. 578 00:26:44,313 --> 00:26:46,193 - He chuckles. - See you in a bit. 579 00:26:50,153 --> 00:26:52,033 You can't help being ill, darling. 580 00:26:52,033 --> 00:26:54,393 I'll just get somebody else to pick her up. 581 00:26:54,393 --> 00:26:57,473 Right. Bye-bye. 582 00:26:57,473 --> 00:26:59,313 Er, Adam? 583 00:26:59,313 --> 00:27:01,273 I saw what you did to that dolphin. 584 00:27:01,273 --> 00:27:03,353 A gentleman never discusses a lady's blowhole. 585 00:27:03,354 --> 00:27:05,674 Do you want my advice, Adam? Erm, not really. 586 00:27:05,674 --> 00:27:07,314 That is exactly your problem. 587 00:27:07,314 --> 00:27:09,274 It was pretty funny, though, right? 588 00:27:24,594 --> 00:27:30,514 ♪ Prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one 589 00:27:30,514 --> 00:27:33,594 ♪ this is the flight number 590 00:27:33,595 --> 00:27:36,595 ♪ of our galactic sun 591 00:27:38,595 --> 00:27:43,555 ♪ prophet six-zero-zero-nine-one 592 00:27:44,915 --> 00:27:46,265 ♪ before we start 593 00:27:46,275 --> 00:27:51,225 ♪ you should know that you're not the only one 594 00:27:51,235 --> 00:27:52,675 ♪ who can hurt me... ♪ 595 00:28:02,956 --> 00:28:04,596 Engine starts. 596 00:28:11,076 --> 00:28:12,796 It's my second-favourite doctor! 597 00:28:12,796 --> 00:28:14,036 Who's number one? 598 00:28:14,036 --> 00:28:15,556 David tennant. First series. 599 00:28:19,156 --> 00:28:21,716 How was work? Fine, thanks. Who are they? 600 00:28:21,716 --> 00:28:24,076 No idea, but they're better craic than your mates upstairs. 601 00:28:24,076 --> 00:28:25,396 Oh, come on. 602 00:28:25,396 --> 00:28:27,556 I'm sure you'll find something in common with them. 603 00:28:27,556 --> 00:28:30,236 There you go. See? Wearing the same t-shirt. 604 00:28:30,237 --> 00:28:32,637 Some guy called... Welly brought them. 605 00:28:32,637 --> 00:28:35,237 Well, they're not too terrible, considering. 606 00:28:38,797 --> 00:28:40,917 Shall we just do this? Come on. 607 00:28:42,237 --> 00:28:44,677 Shouting and cheering 608 00:28:47,957 --> 00:28:50,677 ah! 7:58. There you go. 609 00:28:50,677 --> 00:28:53,917 I knew you wouldn't let me down. 610 00:28:53,917 --> 00:28:57,637 No, you didn't. Yeah, fine. May have lost a small bet. 611 00:28:57,637 --> 00:29:00,037 Nightmare! This place doesn't do jagerbombs! 612 00:29:00,038 --> 00:29:01,398 Whatever will we do? 613 00:29:01,398 --> 00:29:04,638 Adster! Welly. Don't do that. 614 00:29:06,078 --> 00:29:09,758 Where's your t-shirt? Yeah, adster, where's your t-shirt? 615 00:29:09,758 --> 00:29:11,398 Put it on. 616 00:29:13,198 --> 00:29:14,918 Put it on. 617 00:29:14,918 --> 00:29:21,678 Put it on, put it on, put it on, put it on! 618 00:29:21,678 --> 00:29:24,198 Yes! And as for you... 619 00:29:24,198 --> 00:29:26,558 One pint of gin. 620 00:29:26,558 --> 00:29:27,958 No, I'm not going to drink that. 621 00:29:27,958 --> 00:29:30,198 Well, you will be, because it's tradi-ti-on. How can it be 622 00:29:30,199 --> 00:29:31,919 a tradition? I've never got married before. 623 00:29:31,919 --> 00:29:34,559 Right, I need a drink. Is this my stuff? 624 00:29:34,559 --> 00:29:36,999 So, did your mum call? She left a voicemail. 625 00:29:36,999 --> 00:29:38,999 Ah. And you didn't listen. 626 00:29:38,999 --> 00:29:41,999 No. I'm changing my number and moving to Venezuela. 627 00:29:43,679 --> 00:29:45,039 You done there? 628 00:29:45,039 --> 00:29:46,559 Both laugh 629 00:29:46,559 --> 00:29:48,399 right, come on, what do you want? 630 00:29:48,399 --> 00:29:52,119 I think 12 litres of vodka red bull should probably do it. 631 00:29:52,119 --> 00:29:54,679 Er, can I get a bottle of sauvignon blanc and... 632 00:29:54,679 --> 00:29:56,319 Phone buzzes 633 00:29:56,319 --> 00:29:59,039 a rum and coke, please? This'll be jakesy. 634 00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:01,040 He's probably gone to Poland by mistake. Hello? 635 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,880 Kay. Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a... 636 00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:05,520 Pint of gin, pint of gin! 637 00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:07,240 Supermarket. 638 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,520 Sorry, mr Lockhart, how can I help? 639 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:12,360 Er, listen, the locum registrar 640 00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:14,840 hasn't turned up for the night shift. 641 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,200 Erm... who's the senior reg? 642 00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:21,160 Er, I don't think he'd get here from Sydney in time. 643 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:25,040 Well, do say if you've got something more important on. 644 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:27,680 Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm... 645 00:30:27,681 --> 00:30:29,241 No, I can do it. 646 00:30:29,241 --> 00:30:31,001 Will the missus understand? 647 00:30:35,161 --> 00:30:37,681 She'll be fine with it. Good man. Bye! 648 00:30:37,681 --> 00:30:39,321 Lockhart hangs up. 649 00:30:44,681 --> 00:30:47,161 How long are you going to be? A couple of hours? 650 00:30:47,161 --> 00:30:49,961 12. I'm so sorry. And there's no-one else who could...? 651 00:30:52,521 --> 00:30:55,041 I'm sorry. It's really crap for you. 652 00:30:58,522 --> 00:31:02,282 You don't have to stay here, obviously. I'll be grand. 653 00:31:02,282 --> 00:31:04,242 I've never had a... Pint of gin before. 654 00:31:06,402 --> 00:31:08,842 Just a couple more years, then I'll be a consultant, 655 00:31:08,842 --> 00:31:11,242 and it'll just be me, you and an Aston Martin. 656 00:31:11,242 --> 00:31:14,402 It would be nice to live somewhere a bit more spacious. 657 00:31:14,402 --> 00:31:16,402 We can shower in the glove compartment. 658 00:31:16,402 --> 00:31:18,282 Right, go on. You've got some babies to deliver. 659 00:31:21,122 --> 00:31:23,722 You should have gone along with my avalanche idea. 660 00:31:23,722 --> 00:31:26,482 Ok, your first best-manly duty is to rescue my dad. 661 00:31:26,483 --> 00:31:29,403 Welly's trying to get him to drink a shoe full of Sambuca. 662 00:31:29,403 --> 00:31:31,363 Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca! 663 00:31:33,443 --> 00:31:36,123 You're going to hate me. 664 00:31:36,123 --> 00:31:38,803 There's a... Staffing emergency at the hospital. 665 00:31:38,803 --> 00:31:40,483 There's no doctors on labour ward. 666 00:31:40,483 --> 00:31:44,443 No. So I have to go back in. Drink this. Then you can't go in. 667 00:31:46,163 --> 00:31:49,123 I can't. Ok, give me one good reason. 668 00:31:49,123 --> 00:31:50,563 Er... 669 00:31:50,563 --> 00:31:53,603 Er, because I, erm... Because you'd rather be at work. 670 00:31:54,764 --> 00:31:56,484 Yeah, have a good night, mate. 671 00:32:04,484 --> 00:32:06,164 Fuck's sake! 672 00:32:50,565 --> 00:32:53,045 Do you want the good news or the bad news? 673 00:32:53,046 --> 00:32:55,486 Erm, the good. Oh, I was worried you'd say that. 674 00:32:55,486 --> 00:32:57,286 It's all bad, I'm afraid. 675 00:32:57,286 --> 00:32:59,046 The wards are stuffed to the gills, 676 00:32:59,046 --> 00:33:02,686 there's no sho, and the midwife in charge is Tracy. 677 00:33:02,686 --> 00:33:04,846 Well, she was working during the day. The other one. 678 00:33:04,846 --> 00:33:08,046 "Non-reassuring trace." 679 00:33:08,046 --> 00:33:09,846 Right, I'm off home. But call me whenever. 680 00:33:09,846 --> 00:33:11,726 I won't. Good man. 681 00:33:13,606 --> 00:33:16,246 You're very intent on showing me your penis today. 682 00:33:16,246 --> 00:33:18,286 They need to increase the credits 683 00:33:18,286 --> 00:33:20,526 on the scrub machine. You can practically tell 684 00:33:20,526 --> 00:33:23,086 who did your circumcision. Made a right meal of it. 685 00:33:27,567 --> 00:33:29,327 Keep going. 686 00:33:35,487 --> 00:33:38,367 Hi, trace. How can I help? Oh, doctor, thank god you're here. 687 00:33:38,367 --> 00:33:40,367 Can you see room 11 for me? 688 00:33:40,367 --> 00:33:42,847 I'm desperately worried about her. 689 00:33:42,847 --> 00:33:45,247 Quick as you can. 690 00:33:45,247 --> 00:33:47,007 Woman screams. 691 00:33:57,528 --> 00:33:59,448 Baby cries. 692 00:34:08,648 --> 00:34:10,608 Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. 693 00:34:11,928 --> 00:34:15,248 No, I didn't take a photo! It's someone else's baby! 694 00:34:15,248 --> 00:34:17,928 Yeah, I know, mum said the exact same thing. 695 00:34:17,928 --> 00:34:20,248 Actually, I'm not going to make it home this weekend, 696 00:34:20,249 --> 00:34:21,629 but, erm... 697 00:34:21,630 --> 00:34:23,010 She speaks hindi 698 00:34:23,009 --> 00:34:26,649 mm-hm. Yeah, erm, I love you, too. Ok. Bye. 699 00:34:26,649 --> 00:34:28,009 Bye. 700 00:34:28,009 --> 00:34:29,969 What the hell are you still doing here? 701 00:34:29,969 --> 00:34:32,569 Don't you have a depressing flat to go back to? 702 00:34:32,569 --> 00:34:34,849 The incident forms are longer than you think. 703 00:34:34,849 --> 00:34:36,489 Just go home. 704 00:34:36,489 --> 00:34:39,009 I'll do yours when I do mine. 705 00:34:39,009 --> 00:34:41,129 This is yours. Oh, no way! 706 00:34:41,129 --> 00:34:42,649 Alarm blares 707 00:34:42,649 --> 00:34:45,409 I wouldn't break a sweat. Non-reassuring-Tracey's on. 708 00:34:45,409 --> 00:34:47,249 The patient's probably farted. 709 00:34:47,249 --> 00:34:48,969 Woman screams 710 00:34:53,610 --> 00:34:55,410 25 weeks. First baby. 711 00:34:55,410 --> 00:34:58,250 Blood pressure's through the roof. 712 00:34:58,250 --> 00:34:59,690 She screams 713 00:34:59,691 --> 00:35:01,131 grade one caesarean section. 714 00:35:01,130 --> 00:35:02,970 Get anaesthetics round to theatres now. 715 00:35:02,970 --> 00:35:05,730 Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker with placental abruption. 716 00:35:05,730 --> 00:35:07,570 Severe pre-eclampsia. 717 00:35:07,570 --> 00:35:09,610 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home. 718 00:35:09,610 --> 00:35:12,650 Erika, listen. I'm very worried about your baby. 719 00:35:12,650 --> 00:35:14,970 Placenta's coming away. I need to deliver you immediately 720 00:35:14,970 --> 00:35:16,770 to save baby's life. 721 00:35:16,770 --> 00:35:19,690 It's too early! I'm going to perform a caesarean section. 722 00:35:19,691 --> 00:35:20,871 Do you understand? 723 00:35:20,872 --> 00:35:22,052 She screams 724 00:35:25,011 --> 00:35:26,611 do you want your consultant in? 725 00:35:26,611 --> 00:35:28,371 I've got this, thanks, Tracy. 726 00:35:29,451 --> 00:35:32,411 Is my sister here? We've called her, and she'll be here in time 727 00:35:32,411 --> 00:35:34,931 to say hello to your baby. Or goodbye. 728 00:35:34,931 --> 00:35:38,731 Why don't you count down from 20 for me? 729 00:35:38,731 --> 00:35:41,251 20, 19... 18... 730 00:35:41,251 --> 00:35:42,851 Come on. 731 00:35:44,491 --> 00:35:46,771 Are you happy? Ready when you are. 732 00:35:46,771 --> 00:35:49,651 Adam, have you done a 25-week caesarean before? No. 733 00:35:49,652 --> 00:35:51,212 I've seen one. 734 00:36:03,452 --> 00:36:06,012 Pull. Quick. And retractor in. 735 00:36:53,454 --> 00:36:54,654 Adam? 736 00:36:54,654 --> 00:36:57,454 Yeah, chest movement. Adam? 737 00:36:57,454 --> 00:37:00,534 Adam! Er, sorry. Swabs, please. 738 00:37:00,534 --> 00:37:02,374 Let's start the suction. 739 00:37:09,454 --> 00:37:11,334 Oh, my god. 740 00:37:13,414 --> 00:37:15,414 Come on. Shit. 741 00:37:15,415 --> 00:37:18,205 Pressures aren't great here. What's the blood loss like? 742 00:37:18,215 --> 00:37:20,045 Er, it's a litre, a litre-and-a-half. 743 00:37:20,055 --> 00:37:22,165 Can you bleep the on-call haematologist? 744 00:37:22,175 --> 00:37:24,965 I'm going to need some more blood products. 745 00:37:24,975 --> 00:37:27,695 Find out who's the anaesthetic consultant. 746 00:37:28,895 --> 00:37:30,655 More swabs. 747 00:37:35,535 --> 00:37:37,925 I-I can't see anything. It's too thick to stitch. 748 00:37:37,935 --> 00:37:40,605 So much blood. Shit, I can't... 749 00:37:40,615 --> 00:37:42,445 I... I can't get it under... 750 00:37:42,455 --> 00:37:43,895 Fuck! 751 00:37:43,896 --> 00:37:47,056 This is insane. I can't... I can't see anything. Shit! 752 00:37:47,056 --> 00:37:48,656 Fuck! Adam... 753 00:37:48,656 --> 00:37:50,336 You can do this. 754 00:37:50,336 --> 00:37:51,896 I can't. I can't do this. 755 00:37:52,976 --> 00:37:55,536 This woman's going to die, and it's my fault. 756 00:37:55,536 --> 00:37:57,416 Shall we get mr Lockhart in? 757 00:38:01,696 --> 00:38:04,656 Yeah. Yeah, please. Tracy, will you call mr Lockhart 758 00:38:04,656 --> 00:38:06,176 and ask him to come in, please? 759 00:38:06,176 --> 00:38:09,256 I called him before you started. Why did you do that? I... 760 00:38:10,776 --> 00:38:12,256 Thank you. 761 00:38:47,458 --> 00:38:48,858 He retches. 762 00:39:01,978 --> 00:39:03,578 I'm really sorry. 763 00:39:10,178 --> 00:39:12,178 It was really busy, 764 00:39:12,179 --> 00:39:14,819 and I genuinely thought that she was crying wolf. 765 00:39:14,819 --> 00:39:17,899 She was crying severe early-onset pre-eclampsia, 766 00:39:17,899 --> 00:39:21,619 which you'd have known if you'd done so much as a blood test. 767 00:39:21,619 --> 00:39:24,219 And then, for some reason, you attempted an operation 768 00:39:24,219 --> 00:39:26,259 any consultant would struggle with. 769 00:39:27,739 --> 00:39:30,219 Oh, you can buy Tracy a box of chocolates, by the way, 770 00:39:30,219 --> 00:39:31,859 for calling me in. 771 00:39:35,059 --> 00:39:37,459 Can I just say...? No! 772 00:39:40,020 --> 00:39:45,300 Amend your entry from when you first saw this patient this afternoon. 773 00:39:47,140 --> 00:39:49,420 Write that you discussed with me over the phone, 774 00:39:49,420 --> 00:39:52,500 and that I advised you to send her home. 775 00:39:52,500 --> 00:39:54,420 What? 776 00:39:54,420 --> 00:39:56,580 No, you don't have to do that. 777 00:39:56,580 --> 00:39:58,660 Well, you didn't have to come in tonight. 778 00:40:01,380 --> 00:40:02,900 I did. Yeah, you did. 779 00:40:16,341 --> 00:40:18,821 Hi. Um... 780 00:40:18,821 --> 00:40:20,701 Something to keep you going. 781 00:40:53,222 --> 00:40:55,062 Slam. 782 00:41:06,022 --> 00:41:08,502 Phone buzzes. 783 00:41:52,544 --> 00:41:56,384 Hi. I'm one of the obstetric, erm, registrars. 784 00:41:57,344 --> 00:41:59,664 Are you lost? 785 00:41:59,664 --> 00:42:01,704 Erm, I'm looking for... 786 00:42:01,704 --> 00:42:03,744 Baby Van hegan. The 25-weeker. 787 00:42:03,744 --> 00:42:06,634 Ah! Are you the one who, er...? 788 00:42:10,265 --> 00:42:13,305 Well, you're not going to knock over the Incubator, are you? 789 00:42:14,625 --> 00:42:15,985 Bed 5. 790 00:42:44,586 --> 00:42:46,226 I'm really sorry. 791 00:42:46,226 --> 00:42:50,146 I was... Really tired, and I just wanted to get home. 792 00:42:51,946 --> 00:42:54,586 And... this place is insane. 793 00:42:55,946 --> 00:42:57,746 And... 794 00:42:57,746 --> 00:42:59,266 I fucked up. 795 00:42:59,266 --> 00:43:01,466 I mucked up. 796 00:43:01,466 --> 00:43:03,746 Sorry. 797 00:43:03,746 --> 00:43:05,506 I tried my best. 798 00:43:09,187 --> 00:43:12,107 Just promise me you'll have a normal head scan. 799 00:43:30,947 --> 00:43:33,067 Enjoy your last night of pussy. 800 00:44:02,869 --> 00:44:05,909 ♪ I've been workin', baby 801 00:44:08,189 --> 00:44:10,229 ♪ for too long now 802 00:44:11,509 --> 00:44:15,309 ♪ just wanna get next to you, boy 803 00:44:17,149 --> 00:44:20,309 ♪ I've been searchin', baby 804 00:44:21,669 --> 00:44:24,629 ♪ a way to tell you how 805 00:44:26,309 --> 00:44:29,709 ♪ gotta get through to you, boy 806 00:44:31,630 --> 00:44:35,590 ♪ never said it was sunshine 807 00:44:35,590 --> 00:44:38,670 ♪ but you took it all of the time 808 00:44:38,670 --> 00:44:42,670 ♪ never said it was sunshine 809 00:44:42,670 --> 00:44:45,630 ♪ but you took it all of the time 810 00:44:47,470 --> 00:44:49,510 ♪ all of the time 811 00:44:51,190 --> 00:44:53,670 ♪ all of the time 812 00:44:54,670 --> 00:44:56,990 ♪ all of the time 813 00:44:56,990 --> 00:44:59,550 ♪ you took it all of the time 814 00:45:15,231 --> 00:45:18,951 ♪ there's no escaping now 815 00:45:18,951 --> 00:45:21,991 ♪ let me show you how 816 00:45:23,391 --> 00:45:27,031 ♪ what it feels to be true 817 00:45:57,632 --> 00:46:00,592 ♪ I've been workin', baby 818 00:46:02,833 --> 00:46:04,873 ♪ for too long now 819 00:46:06,113 --> 00:46:09,753 ♪ just wanna get next to you, boy 820 00:46:11,913 --> 00:46:14,873 ♪ I've been searchin', baby 821 00:46:16,113 --> 00:46:18,833 ♪ a way to tell you how 822 00:46:20,393 --> 00:46:24,393 ♪ gotta get through to you, boy. ♪